Coming out with your parents

How to tell your mom and dad the truth? How will they stand this news? Most, if not all young homosexuals face this trouble. And most prefer not to upset their parents and try to conceal this fact as long as possible. However, this secret cannot be kept forever.

They need your help

Of course, its first of all up to the parents to decide how to look upon the situation. But shouldnt we help them? Guess, we should and we can. Although each case demands its special approach, some tips we suggest may help in this situation.

They are not so special

Try sympathizing with them, even if youd rather sympathize yourself. Just imagine how much nonsense had these people heard about the matter in their life. Even if they are not homophobes, and used to think of themselves as of open-minded persons, they never expected this would happen to them.
Try to hint they are not alone at all. Share the information that every tenth person in the world admits homosexual disposition in her or him, so it may well turn out that people they meet every day actually are homosexual, too. So, the first step is to let them know they are far from being the first who face this trouble. Lets disappoint them- they are not so exclusive they think.

Sufficient information is a major remedy

Generally speaking, the more information youll manage to provide them with, the easier it will be for them to cope with their fear and prejudices. Even if their first reaction is unwillingness to discuss the topic at all, you may leave some literature somewhere they will find it for sure and wait.

Avoiding treatment

If you managed to start discussing the situation, the main step has been done. Almost all their doubts are quite predictable, and all the answers you already know, of course. Maybe the most difficult for you will be to convince them this is not a sort of mental disorder and it should not be treated anyhow.

Again, provide them the most reliable info you can get. They should realize that insisting on any treatment may only result in unnecessary and even harmful consequences. Who wants to feel guilty for his or her childs unhappiness after all?

They always feel guilty

By the way, about a guilt complex. Be sure, they ask themselves where they made mistake when bringing you up. Thats the way all loving parents established. And again, only sufficient information will help. Ordinary people usually have no idea about the reasons of homosexuality. They need to be enlightened about the current researches as well as about history examples. Finding such information should become a kind of mission for you. All intolerance is based on lack of knowledge, and who else will help us, if we dont?

They care about your happiness

All parents want their children to be happy. Surely, the prejudices about lesbian way of life will not help you mom and dad to believe your happiness is absolutely possible. Try to understand them as they dreamt about the acquaintance with your first boy-friend since your childhood, not speaking about having grand children. As to the last problem, its quite easy to explain them its not an insoluble problem at all, guess you answered this question to yourself let them know the answer, too.

Reveal your way of life

As to your partner (or partners) Try to pay their attention that heterosexuality is not the formula of happiness at all. By the way, heterosexuality is not a synonym of adequate sexual behavior as well. It would not be too difficult to find examples. All you need is just to show them theres nothing special in your relationships and in your way of life. People used to think lesbians and gays do nothing in their life except for sex, and your task is to show them the reality. Pay their attention that being a lesbian you went on studying or working or whatever you doing and nobody would not even suspect anything wrong unless you had decided to come out.Coming out is a challenge. If you made up your mind, its a step to your freedom anyway, though it may be rather painful process. Hope, some of these tips will help you and your parents to overcome it.